Gossip Girl: Mornings are simply more fun on the Upper East Side. Our favorite things to wake up to? The sun in the sky, the Nikkei on the rise, and a wake-up call from your lover. Or your best friend. Rufus: Lily's doing breakfast today. She wants to talk to us. Dan: Ominous. Jenny: Or…

Gossip Girl: While Upper East Siders are hitting the snooze button, Blair Waldorf had a rude awakening when the rooster crowed at dawn this morning. Blair: Never, in my 16,982 hours of schooling, have I ever been sentenced to detention. Serena: I can't believe you added up all the hours of class we've had. Makes…

Gossip Girl: When most people lose a parent, they inherit sorrow, loss and a closet full of outdated clothes. But on the Upper East Side, death's sad chapter comes with a silver lining. Or a gold one if your relatives invested wisely in precious metals. Blair: Morning Jack. Jack Bass (Desmond Harrington): Blair. Blair: Chuck…

Gossip Girl: Gossip Girl here, welcoming you to the New Year. When Manhattanites who flew south for the sun return to their Park Avenue perches. Which means I have a lot of catching up to do. Word is, Serena van der Woodsen tangoed in the New Year in the plazas of Buenos Aires. Guess that…

Dan: I'm amazed at how calm you're acting. Your fifteen year old daughter just moved in with her crazy model friend. Rufus: And with the model's mother. Whom I met today for lunch. And granted Agnes' mother is a little more Courtney Love than June Cleaver, but she's a committed parent. She's gone through similar…

Gossip Girl: There are three things we do alone: we are born, we die, and if we're a high school junior headed for college, we take the SATs. And while the test is said to measure our best traits, preparing for it inevitably brings out the worst. Humility becomes self-doubt. Striving becomes obsession. Some are…

Gossip Girl: Wakey wakey, Upper East Siders. Spring Break is done and I'm starved for a dish. Were you sunning in Crete or sinning in Croatia? Give me the deets. And has anyone spotted our ex-Queen B? Where does the dethroned royalty vacation these days? Dorota Kishlovsky (Zuzanna Szadkowski): Club Bed is over. First day…

Gossip Girl: “What's the difference between gossip and scandal?” So glad you asked, UESForever. Anyone can commit a minor indiscretion and generate a day's worth of buzz. But in order to birth a true scandal, it requires the right person to be in the wrong place. Take one It Girl on a pedestal. Add a…