Marshall: There's a stain above where I sleep and I can't tell if it came down from above or flew up from down here. Ron: Isn't life just great. Marshall: I've seen things no man should see. Steven: Man this is so awesome. The sheets are all messed up like in Basic Instinct. Lloyd: Marshall,…

Marshall: That was awesome. Ron: That was pretty cool. Lloyd: Awesome, that was not. Marshall: Why not? Why wasn't it? Lloyd: I've been thinking this might happen for awhile, but this is sooner than I thought. We have become their brothers. Marshall: So? Lloyd: So I understand, where you're from being someone's brother may not…

Pilot Episode Kim (Busy Philipps): I'm cutting. Who's got gum? Ken offers her a piece. Oh yeah, that's real great. Why don't you blow your nose in some bread and make me a sandwich too. Ken: Why is everyone crawling up my butt today? Beers and Weirs Kim: No, what you gotta do is look for…