Sight Unseen

Hammond: Welcome home, SG-1. How did it go?
O’Neill: Oh, you know General how I love those sandy planets.
Teal’c: The wind was most pleasant.
O’Neill: Jaffa sarcasm at its finest, General.

Hammond: I take it that’s the artifact you mean. What is it?
Carter: Actually we’re not sure.
O’Neill: I’d say it’s some kind of bug zapper, General.
Carter: All I know is it’s emitting energy.

Carter: You only saw a flash of this creature. Are you sure it wasn’t some kind of hallucination?
Jonas: Are you suggesting I’m delusional?
O’Neill: No! No. It’s just… possible that you were seeing something that wasn’t entirely…. Yes, that’s what we’re suggesting.

O’Neill: You could come with.
Carter: Sir?
O’Neill: Fishing, Carter. I’m going fishing.
Carter: You know I’m planning on studying the artifact.
O’Neill: Yes. It’s always something, isn’t it.
Carter: Oh come on, sir. We both know the only you asked is because you knew I had something else to do.
O’Neill: No, really, I think you should come. Fish. Fish some more….

Carter: How are you doing?
Jonas: Oh, well the possibility of my being insane has interfered with my ability to relax.

Vernon: I’m more of an El Camino man myself. Those things are like catnip to the ladies.
O’Neill: Don’t I know it.

Carter: Just what we need: a conspiracy theorist.
Jonas: Who happens to be right about there being a conspiracy.

O’Neill: Look, I know this is a massive cliché, but the place is surrounded.
Vernon: Yeah, you’re telling me. Those monsters are everywhere.

Vernon: So what planet are they from?
O’Neill: Who?
Vernon: The aliens.
O’Neill: Oh. Ah, a place called Melmac.
Vernon: Isn’t that where ALF is from?
O’Neill: Who?
Vernon: ALF, you know, on TV, the puppet.
O’Neill: Never saw it.
Vernon: No kidding?