The Hurt Locket

Gossip Girl: It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. Seems Dickens knew something about life on the Upper East Side. Where the only thing you can count on is that time changes everything. Word has it S. gave up on politics to focus on issues closer to her heart.

Serena: I can’t believe Nate’s finally coming home tomorrow.
Blair: I feel the same way about Dorota’s return. I never should have agreed to let her spend the holidays with Vanya.
Serena: Did I tell you that he texts me every night before he goes to sleep. It’s so sweet.
Blair: Sexting is not sweet. It’s off limits until you’re in a relationship. You haven’t even been on a date.
Serena: Well you’ll be happy to know he asked me to go to a dinner for the French ambassador tomorrow night.
Blair: Oh. Well chastity belts go very well with formal wear.

Blair: You know how torturous it is for me to find shiny things that aren’t intended for me.
Chuck: It’s just a worthless trinket some woman left by my father’s grave.
Blair: And you aren’t even the least bit curious about someone who wears your father around her neck?
Chuck: One of his concubines had his name tattooed on her ass. I have more important things to do than search for another member of the female Bart Bass Fan Club.
Blair: Like helping me achieve the college experience I so greatly deserve?

Lily: So how was your mom’s? I’m sure your dad called every day.
Jenny: Well he v-chatted for present opening. You didn’t want to go to Telluride with him, huh? I can’t say I blame you. Those Lincoln Hawk guys can be kind of annoying.
Lily: Well he was so excited when it came up I couldn’t stand for him to miss out.

Lily: So. Your father and I haven’t really discussed you having boys alone in your room. So maybe just keep the door open?
Jenny: Lily, if we wanted to have sex we’d just go to a hotel. And seriously, it’s not like that with us.
Lily: Well what is it like? I mean he seems happy to see you—
Jenny: I’ll open the door if anything changes.
Lily: Oh! And you wouldn’t happen to know when your father was coming back? Larissa accidentally lost the itinerary.
Jenny: I think he said today, but just… call him and ask.

Damien (Kevin Zegers): I have a puzzle that needs solving. And I know how much you Humphreys like games.

Gossip Girl: With enough time, we all find what we’re looking for. Even if it was there all along. And when time slows and suddenly every moment counts, all you want is for this time to last forever.

Nate: Hey. Wha? I’m not that late.
Dan: I’m sorry, man. I was just hoping you were Vanessa.
Nate: Oh, you invited Vanessa here too?
Dan: No. Not exactly. But she does spend a lot of time here.
Nate: I take it that means you still haven’t talked to her.
Dan: Or gotten a text. Or seen her. It’s my fault—I moved too fast, you know? I read like five self-help blogs about how to turn friends into lovers. Yes they use that word. I was a little down at my mom’s place.

Serena: Hey.
Blair: Oh. Looks like my advice went the way of the clog.
Serena: What are you talking about?
Blair: The clog? An ugly wooden show that tried to make a statement and then disappeared. Just like your resolve to take things slow with Nate.

Dan: I dated Serena for over a year. And if you want to make things work you’re going to have to be able come up for air. Which is really not her favorite thing to do.

Blair: You are the one Nate has always wanted and could never have. It’s like a diet. After years of starvation you can’t just let him gorge on sundaes. He’ll panic and decide he hates ice cream.
Serena: Except I’m not ice cream and Nate and I don’t need to play games.
Blair: Everyone needs to play games. Look you’ve already failed to come out of the gate with any restraint or control. Now all you can do is introduce some competition. Make him work for it.
Serena: Blair! That’s the worst advice I’ve ever heard.
Blair: Mm hm. Just wait ’till he starts passing on dessert.

Jenny: I can wear it. I can make this only in mine the pailettes won’t be empty.
Damien: You put the pills in the jacket?
Jenny: Yeah. I wear it to the dinner, check it, and then Violette and I switch coat check tags. I take her coat—
Damien: —and she’ll leave with yours. That’s not bad.
Jenny: Not bad! C’mon, it’s brilliant.

Dan: Lily.
Lily: Oh, hello Daniel.
Dan: What are you doing in Brooklyn?
Lily: Uh. I was hoping your father would be here.
Dan: He was supposed to be back this morning. Can’t imagine he’d come here before going to see you.
Lily: Well I just figured since he hadn’t seen you over the holidays. You know how sentimental he is.

Lily: Well you know what? Maybe he decided to stay and ski another day.
Dan: Oh yeah, I don’t think that’s what happened.
Lily: Well. I should go. If you see him, tell him I stopped by.

Blair: Vronsky, where are you? Anna Karenina texted you an hour ago. She wants to celebrate.
Chuck: Look, I’m sorry but Anna will have to wait. I’m about to walk into a meeting.
Blair: Monsieur Durie. Are you bringing him here to surprise me?
Chuck: As it turns out I wasn’t able to attend the lunch.
Blair: Are you in the hospital? Since I know that you’re alive there could be no other possible reason you would sacrifice my entire future.

Nate: Woah. Hey Blair.
Blair: It’s Anna Karenina. You never read it. Don’t worry about it.
Nate: I never do.

Gossip Girl: Heure, hora, [laat?]. No matter what language you say it in, looks like S. just started the clock on a ticking time bomb.

Rufus: I thought you’d be at school by now.
Dan: I thought you lived on the Upper East Side with your wife.

Rufus: I’m not willing to explain myself, Dan.
Dan: Alright fine. You can make your own damn waffles.
Rufus: C’mon, Dan.
Dan: Listen, you’re the one who’s always saying to be honest and talk about things, so… I really hope you’re not going to let your marriage die because you’re scared to take your own advice.

Damien: We’re going to have to do our little dinner some other time.
Jenny: What? I thought we were going to do this together. It’s my plan.
Damien: Yeah. And I thank you. It’s just that… anyone can check the jacket. {Jenny’s not buying it} Um… I’m going with someone else. Serena, actually. We’re old friends from boarding school.
Jenny: Serena’s with Nate now.
Damien: I don’t know about that. She’s the one that called and asked me.
Jenny: Well you know she’s changed since boarding school and ah, there’s no way she’s going to go to a state dinner wearing a jacket filled with pills.
Damien: I probably won’t tell her about that then.
Jenny: Well then maybe I will.
Damien: See if you were to do that then I’d have to tell her how you know obviously. Anyway. Don’t worry. You’ll still get your cut.

Chuck: I know you may find this hard to comprehend, but some things are more important than your social climbing agenda.

Nate: You came with him?
Serena: You came with her? I think you’re in the wrong place. Prom is down the street.
Nate: Oh that’s fine. I’ll just let you get back to your Euro fun.

Jenny: Serena, I love your jacket. It’s so beautiful.
Damien: Yeah, actually let me help you with that.
Serena: No, it’s okay. I’m going to keep it on. It’s so pretty and it was a gift from you.

Gossip Girl: So much for diplomacy. Let the international games begin.

Blair: Serena! And not Nate. Hi. I’m Blair.
Damien: Damien. Pleasure.

Blair: I see you took my advice. It’s good to keep Nate on his toes. And nice choice of competition.
Serena: Thank you. Your idea’s completely juvenile. But it seems to be working. I still can’t believe he came with Jenny though.
Blair: If I know Jenny, she came with him.

Serena: Blair, you know don’t need Chuck. Anyone that meets you can see you’re an elitist snob who’s perfect to run a secret society. Bon chance!

Blair: Chuck. I knew you’d see the error of your ways. Monsieur Durie just stepped out for his cigarette break. Which gives us two and a half minutes, maybe four if it’s a Galoise.

Blair: You know your mother died during childbirth.
Chuck: What if she didn’t? What if it was just another of my father’s many lies?
Blair: Look. It makes sense that when you finally let your father go your mother would reappear.
Chuck: She’s not a ghost Blair.

Blair: Whoever she is, it just seems like she’ll make losing your mom hurt all over again.
Chuck: Do you really think anything could be more painful than killing my own mother and having my father hate me for it my whole life. If there is any chance this isn’t what happened I have to know.

Gossip Girl: Sometimes, despite the risk, the only thing to do is seize the moment. Or whatever else you can grab.

Rufus: We need to talk.
Lily: Rufus. Finally! I must have called you a hundred times.
Rufus: I told you I’d call you back when I was ready.
Lily: I guess I just didn’t expect it to take quite so long.
Rufus: Well I guess you should have thought about that before you spent the night in a hotel room with your ex-husband.

Elizabeth (Laura Harring): I’m sorry I can’t help you find whatever it is you’re looking for.

Blair: Elizabeth.
Elizabeth: I already told your friend everything I know.
Blair: And he may have bought it, but I originated that innocent, doe-eyed stare. I usually employ it when I know more than I’m willing to let on. Chuck spent his entire life believing that he killed his mother. If you know anything that could take away even a second of that pain it would be cruel not to share it. Otherwise leaving town means never having to say you’re sorry.

Gossip Girl: Could there be a secret even B can’t crack? Only time will tell.

Gossip Girl: With enough time eventually we all see what was right in front of us. And realize no matter how long it took, it was worth the wait.

Blair: Are you all right?
Chuck: I spent eighteen years accepting the fact that my mother was dead. It was misguided to let one of my father’s girlfriends allow me to question that. To hope things may be different.
Blair: Your real mother would never turn her back on a chance to know you.
Chuck: I don’t have a real mother, Blair. I never will.
Blair: That doesn’t mean you’re alone. I love you, Chuck. And I’ll always be your family.

Gossip Girl: But for some, that time never comes. Instead of healing old wounds, the wait just open new ones. Time after time. XOXO — Gossip Girl