Doctor Who Series 9

The Witch’s Familiar

2015.09.27    S09E02

Jenna Coleman  Julian Bleach  Michelle Gomez  Peter Capaldi

Missy: Consider the Doctor. The Doctor trapped. The Doctor alone. You all right there, dear?
Clara: Where are we? How did we—?
Missy: Shh now. Mummy’s talking. Okay. I’m going to tell you a story of the Doctor.  It’s classic. On the run. No TARDIS. No friends. No help. In other words, the Doctor happy. It was a long time ago. Doesn’t matter which face he was wearing. They’re all the Doctor to me. So let’s give it to the eyebrows.
Clara: But the Daleks!
Missy: Yes, I’m coming to that.
Clara: Shouldn’t we be, um… I don’t want to say, dead.
Missy: Hush! {continuing} He’s traveling by teleporter. Unfortunately his teleporter is out of power. Also unfortunate, he’s being stalked by, oh say about 50 android assassins. I may be rounding up! Ow. Fifty invisible, indestructible android assassins, all exclusively programmed to kill him.
Clara: Why are you sharpening that stick?
Missy: Well I’ve no idea how long we’re going to be stuck out here. Might have to go hunting.
Clara: So… why am I tied up?
Missy: In case there’s nothing to hunt. So, the Doctor then. Surrounded. Outnumbered. Outgunned. And… freeze. Nanoseconds to live. Four, I’d say. Being generous. Now my question is this: how did he survive? Oh come on, Clara. You know him. Consider the Doctor.
Clara: Where did he get that teleport thingie?
Missy: Oh good! Good! He stole one from an android.
Clara: So. I’m guessing he uses the same energy as the android weapons. Right?
Missy: Excellent! Not seeing you as sandwiches now.
Clara: Okay then. He uses the energy wave from the android weapons to recharge the teleport bracelet. And at the exact moment he’s supposed to disintegrate, he actually teleports. Hang on, that’s how you did it. That’s how we escaped the Daleks.
Missy: I modified the same principles for our vortex manipulators, yes. Blew them off, I’m afraid.
Clara: But the Doctor, he improvised it.
Missy: He must have got through several thousand calculations in the time it takes to fire off a disintegrator. Seriously, what a swot!
Clara: So the androids think he’s dead and the Doctor escapes.
Missy: No. He’s the Doctor. He fell into a nest of vampire monkeys. But that’s another story!

Missy: Why does the Doctor always survive?
Clara: Because he’s clever!
Missy: Yes, but there’s lots of clever dead people. I love killing clever-clogs. They make the best faces.
Clara: Because he always assumes he’s going to win. He always knows there’s a way to survive. He just has to go and find it.
Missy: Yes, except this time, he made a will. And threw himself a goodbye party. Now if the Doctor assumes he is going to die, what happens then?
Clara: We do.
Missy: He’s trapped at the heart of the Dalek empire. He’s a prisoner of the creatures who hate him most in the universe. Between us and him is everything the deadliest race in all of history can throw at us. We, on other hand, have a pointy stick. How do we start?
Clara: We assume we’re gonna win.
Missy: Oh. Pity, really. I was actually quite peckish.

Clara: Can I have a stick too?
Missy: Make your own stick.

The Doctor: Admit it. You’ve all had this exact nightmare.

The Doctor: So. Anyone for dodgems?

Clara: Daleks have sewers?
Missy: With one significant difference.
Clara: Being?
Missy: They’re ever so slightly alive.
Clara: They’re what?

The Doctor: Of course the real question is, where did I get the cup of tea. Answer: I’m the Doctor. Just accept it.
You are unharmed.
The Doctor: Proposition: Davros is an insane, paranoid genius who has survived among several billion trigger-happy mini-tanks for centuries. Conclusion: I’m definitely having his chair.

Missy: In future, if you’re going to take my stick, do me the courtesy of actually killing me. Teamwork is all about respect.
Clara: We’re not a team.
Missy: Of course we are. Every miner needs a canary.

The Doctor: I’ve been at the heart of your empire for 42 minutes. And I own it. And I haven’t even got out of my chair. Ask me what I want.
Dalek: What do you want?
The Doctor: Clara Oswald.

Missy: Listen to that. The Doctor without hope. Nobody is safe now. He’ll burn everything. Us too.

Clara: What are you doing?
Missy: Murdering a Dalek. I’m a Time Lady. It’s our golf.

Dalek: Damage levels insignificant.
Missy: Oh really? I think you’re forgetting you’re surrounded by a bunch of very old, very angry Daleks. You just got yourself a puncture in a bad neighborhood! Meet the locals, all blind and squelchy and out of their tiny minds, but they can still smell! Nobody hates like a Dalek. Here they come! I think they want to steal your motor!

Davros (Julian Bleach): I am dying, Doctor.
The Doctor: You keep saying that, you keep not dying. Can you give it some welly? Come on!

Davros: I am connected to the life force of every Dalek on this planet. It is what has kept me alive. As their hearts beat, so does mine.
The Doctor: Ooo!  Nice. Vampiring of your own creations just to eke out your days. I’m surprised that the Daleks allow it.
Davros: Oh they have no choice. My Daleks are afflicted with a genetic defect.
The Doctor: What defect?
Davros: Respect. Mercy for their father. Design flaws I was unable to eliminate.

Davros: Imagine. To hold in your hand the heartbeat of every Dalek on Skaro. They send me life. Is it beyond the wit of a Time Lord to send them death? A little work and it could be done.
The Doctor: Now why would you be telling me this?
Davros: Genocide. In a moment. Such slaughter. Not in self defense. Not as a simple act of war. Genocide. As a choice. Are you ready, Doctor? So many backs with a single knife. Are you ready to be a god?

Davros: Is this the conscience of the Doctor or his shame? The shame that brought you here.
The Doctor: There’s no such thing as the Doctor. I’m just a bloke in a box. Telling stories! And I didn’t come here because I’m ashamed. A bit of shame never hurt anyone. I came… because you’re sick and you asked. And because sometimes, on a good day, if I try very hard, I’m not some old Time Lord who ran away. I’m the Doctor.
Davros: Compassion then.
The Doctor: Always.
Davros: It grows strong and fierce in you, like a cancer.
The Doctor: I hope so.
Davros: It will kill you in the end.
The Doctor: I wouldn’t die of anything else.
Davros: You may rely on it.

Missy: To control the unit you just have to think. Novel idea, but let’s try it.

Missy: Just don’t get emotional. Emotional fires the gun.

Davros: There is a question, Doctor. One I have longed to ask.
The Doctor: Yeah, well if you’re gonna put your hand on my knee it isn’t gonna go well.
Davros: Why did you leave Gallifrey?
The Doctor: Well because I did.
Davros: You stole a TARDIS and ran and ran. Why?
The Doctor: It was a boring place, Gallifrey. I was going out of my mind.
Davros: Yet you long to return.
The Doctor: Ah, well I’m inconsistent.
Davros: But it is always the same lie.
The Doctor: What lie?
Davros: You weren’t bored. No one runs the way you have run for so small a reason.
The Doctor: I do.
Davros: No. You don’t.

Davros: Colony Sarff confiscated these items on your arrival. A Time Lord Confession Dial I believe. Your confession.  Tell me. Send me to my grave with this precious knowledge. What is the Doctor’s confession?

Davros: Still you play the fool.
The Doctor: Well by now that should make you nervous.

Missy: Is it still the same old Supreme Dalek these days? I fought him once on the slopes of the netherworld. Tell him the bitch is back.

The Doctor: How long has it been, you and I?
Davros: Long enough. Galaxies have burned.
The Doctor: And now you ask me a personal question?
Davros: You have slaughtered billions of my children, as I have slaughtered billions of your race. We have exhausted the conventional means of communication.
The Doctor: My people are alive. They didn’t die. I brought them back. I found a way.
Davros: Is this true?
The Doctor: Gallifrey is back in the sky. I don’t know where—I may never know. But Gallifrey is back and it is safe. From both of us.
Davros: Doctor. My most sincere congratulations.
The Doctor: I’m sorry?
Davros: This is wonderful news. Beyond all hope. I congratulate you.
The Doctor: Why are you saying that?
Davros: A man should have a race. A people, an allegiance. A man should belong.

Davros: If you have redeemed the Time Lords from the fire, do not lose them again. Take the darkest path into the deepest hell, but protect your own, as I have sought to protect mine.

Davros: Did I do right, Doctor? Tell me. Was I right? I need to know, before the end. Am I a good man?
The Doctor: You really are dying, aren’t you.
Davros: Look at me. Did you doubt it.
The Doctor: Yes.
Davros: Then we have established one thing only.
The Doctor: What?
Davros: You are not a good doctor.

Davros: Pity. I had hoped to see the sun one last time, with the eyes of my true self.

Missy: You’re my secret favorite. Don’t tell the others.

Davros: It is so good of you to help me.
The Doctor: I’m not helping you. I’m helping a little boy I abandoned on a battlefield. I think I owe him a sunrise.
Davros: I have always admired you, Doctor. I wish, just once, we had been on the same side.
The Doctor: Look, the sun’s coming up. We’re on the same side now.
Davros: I regret I cannot open my eyes.

The Doctor: Okay. Don’t ever tell anyone that I did this. A little bit of regeneration energy. Probably cost me an arm or a leg somewhere down the line. Or I’ll just be really little.

The Doctor: What are you doing?
Davros: Regeneration energy. The ancient magic of the Time Lords. I thought I would have to tear you apart to take it form you, but as always your compassion is your downfall. You have opened your veins of your own free will. And all Daleks shall drink the blood of Gallifrey. They shall rise stronger than ever.

Missy: No no no, Doctor. What have you done?
Clara: What’s happening?
Missy: I have to find the Doctor.

Davros: There was a prophecy, Doctor, on your own world.
The Doctor: Please, you must, you must stop this.  You must stop this!
Davros: It spoke of a hybrid creature. Two great warrior races forced together to create a warrior greater than either. Is that what you ran from, Doctor? Your part in the coming of the hybrid? Half-Dalek, half-Time Lord.

Davros: Do you understand what has happened? Hear my children sing.
The Doctor: Two.
Missy: Oooooo. I know that face.
Davros: All praise Davros. Creator and savior of the Daleks.
The Doctor: One.
Davros: What is that? What’s happening?

The Doctor: I knew exactly what you were doing and I let you do it. You transmitted regeneration energy into every Dalek on this planet. Every single one.
Davros: What have you done?
The Doctor: One word. No, two words actually. Ah, first word… moron. Second word: sewers.

The Doctor: Generations of Daleks just woke up very cross and they are coming up the pipes. Or to put it another way: bye!
Davros: Doctor, you must help me!
Missy: Can I just say it’s been an absolute pleasure to finally meet you. {she pokes his third eye}

Clara Dalek: Mercy! Mercy!
The Doctor: You shouldn’t be able to say that.
Clara Dalek: Mercy!
The Doctor: That word shouldn’t exist in your vocabulary. How did Davros teach you to say that?
Clara Dalek: Mercy!
The Doctor: Why aren’t you trying to kill me?
Clara Dalek: Mercy!
Clara: Because I would never kill you. You are the last person I would ever kill.
Clara Dalek: I show mercy.
The Doctor: I’m putting the gun down. Open your casing.
Clara: How?
The Doctor: Just think the word “open.” It’ll work.
Missy: Oh… hmph. Look at that. Now there’s a surprise.
The Doctor: Missy. Run.
Clara: Doctor.
Missy: In a way, this is why I gave her to you in the first place. To make you see. The friend inside the enemy, the enemy inside the friend.
The Doctor: I’m sorry, Clara. I’m so sorry.
Missy: Everyone’s a bit of both. Everyone’s a hybrid.
The Doctor: I said run!
Missy: It wasn’t me who ran, Doctor. That was always you.

Dalek Supreme: What is happening. Explain! Explain!
The Doctor: Dalek Supreme, your sewers are revolting.

The TARDIS has been destroyed!
The Doctor: Oh, don’t be silly. Of course it hasn’t. It’s just redistributed itself for a moment. Hostile Action Dispersal System. I’ll just give it a quick blast from my sonic and the real time envelope will reassemble right here.
Clara: Doctor, you don’t have your screwdriver.
The Doctor: Oh yeah. I’m over screwdrivers. They spoil the line of your jacket. These days I am all about wearable technology. {he pulls out his sunglasses}
Clara: No. No. Seriously?

Missy: You know what? I’ve just had a very clever idea.

Clara: No chance you’re going to tell me what’s in that Confession Dial, I suppose.
The Doctor: Doesn’t make sense.
Clara: What doesn’t?
The Doctor: When you were in the Dalek you made it say “mercy.” It shouldn’t have understood the concept. It shouldn’t have been able to say it. How did a tiny piece of mercy get into the DNA of the Daleks?

Young Davros (Joey Price): Help me! You can’t leave me. You promised. You said I had a chance! Who are you? I don’t get it. How did you get there?
The Doctor: From the future.
Young Davros: Are you gonna save me?
The Doctor: I’m gonna save my friend. The only way I can. Exterminate!

The Doctor: Come on. I’ll take you home.
Who’s side are you on? Are you the enemy?
The Doctor: I’m not sure that any of that matters. Friends, enemies. So long as there’s mercy. Always mercy.