Doctor Who Series 4

Planet of the Ood

2008.04.19    

Ayesha Dharker  Paul Kasey  Silas Carson  Tim McInnerny

Announcer: The Ood. They came from a distant world. They voyaged across the stars. All with one purpose.
Ood (Silas Carson): Do you take milk and sugar?
Announcer: To serve!

The Doctor: Set the controls to random. Mystery tour! Outside that door could be any planet, anywhere, anywhen, in the whole wide— Are you all right?

The Doctor: Snow! Ah, real snow. Proper snow at last!

Donna: Now that’s what I call a spaceship. You’ve got a box, he’s got a Ferrari.

Solana Mercurio (Ayesha Dharker): Sorry but according to your own rules, sir, there’s no alcohol allowed on base.
Mr. Halpen (Tim McInnerny): It’s hair tonic. If you must know. Five years ago I had a full head of hair. Stress, that’s what this is. Stress.

Delta-50: The circle must be broken.
The Doctor: What do you mean? Delta-50, what circle?

The Doctor: His eyes turned red.
Donna: What’s that mean?
The Doctor: Trouble.

The Doctor: The Ood are harmless. They’re completely benign. Except the last time I met them there was this force, like a stronger mind. Powerful enough to take them over.
Donna: What sort of force?
The Doctor: Long story.
Donna: Long walk.
The Doctor: It was the Devil.
Donna: If you’re gonna take the mickey I’ll just put my hood back on.
The Doctor: Must be something different this time though. Something closer to home.

Solana: Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the Ood Sphere. And isn’t it bracing!

Solana: Here at the Double O—that’s Ood Operations—we like to think of the Ood as our trusted friends. We keep the Ood healthy, safe and educated. We don’t just breed the Ood. We make them better. Because at heart what is an Ood, but a reflection of us. If your Ood is happy, then you’ll be happy too.

Solana: I’d now like to point out the new innovation from Ood Operations. We’ve introduced a variety package with the Ood Translator Ball. You can now have the standard setting— How are you today, Ood?
Ood 1: I am perfectly well. Thank you.
Solana: Or perhaps after a stressful day a little something for the gentlemen. And how are you, Ood?
Ood 2: All the better for seeing you.
Solana: And the comedy classic option— Ood, you dropped something.
Ood 3: D’oh!

The Doctor: The year 4126. That is the second great and bountiful human Empire.

Donna: Back home, the papers and the telly, they keep saying we haven’t got long to live. Global warming. Flooding. All the bees disappearing.
The Doctor: Yeah. That thing about the bees is odd.

Mr. Halpen: Ood Sigma, have you seen this before?
Ood Sigma (Paul Kasey): Humanity defines us, sir. We look to you for answers.
Mr. Halpen: Oh, fat lot of good, all of you.

The Doctor: I’ve had enough of the shmoozing. Do you fancy going off the beaten track?
Donna: Rough Guide to the Oodsphere. Works for me.

The Doctor: Last time I met the Ood I never thought— Never asked.
Donna: That’s not like you.
The Doctor: I was busy. So busy I couldn’t save them. I had to let the Ood die. I reckon I owe them one.

Donna: A great big empire, built on slavery.
The Doctor: It’s not so different from your time.
Donna: Oy, I haven’t got slaves.
The Doctor: Who d’you think made your clothes?
Donna: Is that why you travel ’round with a human at your side? It’s not so you can show them the wonders of the universe, it’s so you can take cheap shots?
The Doctor: Sorry.
Donna: Don’t. Spaceman.

The Doctor: Ood, tell me, does “the circle” mean anything to you?
The Ood: The circle must be broken.
Donna: Whoa, that is creepy.
The Doctor: But what is it? What is the circle?
The Ood: The circle must be broken.
The Doctor: Why?
The Ood: So that we can sing.

Donna: If people back on Earth knew what was going on here…
Solana: Don’t be so stupid. Of course they know.
Donna: They know how you treat the Ood?
Solana: They don’t ask. Same thing.

Donna: Is that…?
The Doctor: It’s a brain. A hind brain. The Ood are born with a secondary brain. Like the amygdala in humans, it processes memory and emotions. You get rid of that, you wouldn’t be Donna any more. You’d be like an Ood, a processed Ood.
Donna: So the company… cuts off their brains?
The Doctor: And they stitch on the translator.
Donna: Like a lobotomy. I spent all that time looking for you, Doctor, because I thought it would be so wonderful out here. I want to go home.

Donna: Well do something! You’re the one with all the tricks! You must’ve met Houdini!
The Doctor: These are really good handcuffs!
Donna: Oh well I’m glad of that. I mean at least we’ve got quality!

The Doctor: Funny thing, the subconscious. Takes all sorts of shapes. It came out in the red-eye as revenge. Came out in the rabid Ood as anger. And then there was patience. All that intelligence and mercy focused on Ood Sigma. How’s the hair loss, Mr Halpen?
Mr. Halpen: What have you done?
The Doctor: Oh, they’ve been preparing you for a very long time. And now you’re standing next to the Ood Brain. Mr Halpen, can you hear it? Listen!
Mr. Halpen: What have you… I’m… No…
Donna: They… They turned him into an Ood?
The Doctor: Yup.
Donna: He’s an Ood.
The Doctor: I noticed.

Donna: It’s weird, being with you, I can’t tell what’s right and what’s wrong any more.
The Doctor: It’s better that way. People who know for certain tend to be like Mr. Halpen.

The Doctor: The message has gone out. That song resonated across the galaxies, everyone heard it. Everyone knows. The rockets are bringing them back. The Ood are coming home.
Ood Sigma: We thank you, Doctor Donna. Friends of Oodkind. And what of you now? Will you stay? There is room in the song for you.
The Doctor: Oh, I’ve… sort of got a song of my own, thanks.
Ood Sigma: I think your song must end soon.
The Doctor: Meaning?
Ood Sigma: Every song must end.

The Doctor: We’ll be off.
Ood Sigma: Take this song with you.
The Doctor: We will.
Donna: Always.
Ood Sigma: And know this, Doctor Donna. You will never be forgotten. Our children will sing of the Doctor Donna. And our childrens’ children. And the wind and the ice and the snow will carry your names forever.