Cats hate Nightmare Roommate: A story in two parts


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I have so much I’ve wanted to write about and I keep forgetting. Okay, time to ramble:

We had some relatives in town this weekend. And last weekend. And the weekend before. Mom’s going nuts with cleaning and entertaining.

Anyway, we went out to dinner with a cousin last night.

We were ordering a round of drinks while waiting to be seated and my 95-pound mother ordered a Long Island Iced Tea.

Or at least she tried to. (“Mom, do you know what’s in a Long Island Iced Tea?”)

I managed to talk her out of it. Which is good because I don’t think she’s ever even had a mixed drink. After half a LIIT she’d have been under the table.

So she went with wine instead, and half a glass later she was lip synching to “We will rock you” by Queen. She was disappointed when they cut to another song in the middle, to move on to a different station (pre-programmed song stations), thank god.

Which brings me to another ramble:

Two songs later I found myself trying desperately to hear what song was playing (the music was really quiet and the speakers were in the bar). I finally figured out that it was Old 97s’ “Nineteen” from Fight Songs. Which is not completely a shock, as it’s a poppy sorta song and not unheard of in a pseudo-trendy bar/restaurant. But still surprising considering the limited popularity of the (awesome) Old 97s. So, chalk it up to someone at one of those piped-in music companies having some taste.

So I stopped paying attention to the background music until I again heard a song that I swore was really familiar. So I tried to figure it out again.

This one took a little longer. Turns out it was “Ticket Time” by Whiskeytown. The reason this is so completely bizarre is because, not only is Whiskeytown really pretty much Alt Country (I know, I know, don’t yell at me for saying Alt Country), but this song wasn’t even released on a Whiskeytown CD. It’s on (I think) In Your Wildest Dreams EP, which maybe a dozen people own.

I mean, it’s like hearing Son Volt’s “Chanty” on a Volkswagen commercial (Oh wait, that already happened).

Anyway, long story longer: within the next half hour they also played Lucinda’s “I love you righteously” (Or whatever. The one off of World Without Tears) and another Old 97s song, “Singular Girl”.

Okay, one more random thing. There were all these cousins in town this weekend (my Mom’s cousins; never met ’em before). And one or two of them asked me if I was liking my home life now that I wasn’t living with Nightmare Roommate. Only they actually called her Nightmare Roommate. I’ve officially trademarked a phrase. Heh.

When I started living with NR, I found out that she loved cats. Had salt and pepper shaker cats, blankets with cats on them, loved her some cats, she did. Soon after we moved in together it became obvious that Ramona was terrified of Nightmare Roommate. Ran from the room whenever NR entered the room. Which was weird.

Turns out that when I wasn’t around, Nightmare Roommate regularly caught Ramona unawares and grabbed her, picked her up, and hugged the stuffing out of her.

Yeah, Ramona loves that.

So we started talking about NR’s cat, who she loves so much. They have a special relationship, she said. Every time she visited her parents (she’d lived there 29 years until she moved in with me) and her cat would come around she’d pick her up and hug her and hug her, and Fluffy would hiss and scratch and fight and it was their special game they played.

Yeah… honey? Your cat hates you.