Klutzy Klaire


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Announcer: It’s the Krusty Komedy Klassic!
Krusty: Hey, hey! It’s great to be back at the Apollo Theater, and— {turns around, notices sign} K-K-K? That’s not good.

I tripped in the dark on my way to the bathroom and damn near broke my nose. My room is a mess. My nose is hideous. I am dumb.

My officemate just reminded me my nose is going to bruise up shortly. Great. I’m going to look like a battered wife. I should use the Amy Sedaris method of explaining facial bruises:

“I’ve never been this happy in my entire life! I finally found my true love.”