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2005.06.18    

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It’s time for another Summer Season episode! Ready? Begin!

I lived with a woman for two years that I like to call Nightmare Roommate (NR for short). She didn’t immediately earn that moniker, but it certainly didn’t take long, believe you me.

A few personality details to give you a general idea about NR:

• Very racist, very judgmental, very snobby
• Very obsessed with money and those who had it
• Very oblivious as to how her personality came off to other people (something that hindered her in her job—she got passed up repeatedly for promotions)
• Very demanding of her parents (she lived at home until 28, made her mom pay part of her rent when she and I moved in together (and I paid more rent than she did—yes, very stupid). In fact she had a habit of telling her mother that she would be paying NR’s credit card bills that month.
• Very overweight (I watched her pound down a box of Krispy Kremes within the course of 12 hours on several occasions, and I don’t believe I ever witnessed her eat any fresh produce)
• Not very bright or sophisticated but thoroughly convinced otherwise
• Obsessed with buying things

So—finally—in honor of Nightmare Roommate, I suppose I ought to finally post all the NR stories. Some are long, some are short, some aren’t all that interesting or funny to anyone but me. So, heretoforewith:

THE NIGHTMARE ROOMMATE YEARS

Enjoy.

Or not. Free country and all.

And keep in mind that they’re rough drafts. Sometimes they work, sometimes not so much. I personally recommend The Butter Story.