Torchwood Gwen Cooper

Series 1

2006.10.22    

Eve Myles

Everything Changes

“Move ’em back,” they said. “Leave it safe.” “Special access,” they said.
Gwen Cooper: For who?
Torchwood.

Gwen: Who’s Torchwood?
PC Andy: Special Ops or something. about the coffee. Is that hot?
Gwen: Ah yeah, have it. But they’re not allowed in there. They could contaminate the evidence and all sorts. I mean how can they—
PC Andy: Don’t ask me. There’s no procedure any more. It’s a disgrace.

Gwen: But those people last night—the people in the car. Who were they? What’s Torchwood?
PC Andy: ‘Don’t know. Special Ops.
Gwen: Yeah, but what does that mean?
PC Andy: Bet you ten quid they’re DNA specialists. It’s all DNA these days. Like that CSI bollocks. CSI: Cardiff, I’d like to see that. They’d be measuring the velocity of a kebab.

Yvonne: No sign of Captain Jack Harkness.
Gwen: Did you search outside Cardiff?
Yvonne: No, that never even occurred to me. Of course I did. I went nationwide. There’s about 15 Jacks and Johns with that surname. None of them’s a Captain.
Gwen: Suppose he could have made it up.
Yvonne: The only Captain Jack Harkness on record is American.
Gwen: That’s it—he’s American.
Yvonne: Which you forgot to tell me.
Gwen: So who is he?
Yvonne: American volunteer. Royal Air Force. RAF Squadron. Except he disappeared. Vanished off the records, and presumed dead.
Gwen: When was that?
Yvonne: 1941 at the height of the Blitz. On the morning of January 21, 1941, Captain Jack Harkness failed to report for duty. Never seen again until now. What’s going on, Gwen? You seeing ghosts?

Gwen: Who are you?
Jack: Torchwood.
Gwen: What’s Torchwood?
Jack: This is Torchwood.

Gwen: I’m getting tired of following you.
Jack: No you’re not. And you never will.

Jack: That is so Welsh.
Gwen: What is?
Jack: I show you something fantastic, you find fault.

Gwen: The thing is I just don’t understand—
Jack: No, I’ll tell you what I don’t understand. You’re going to rattle on with that “How can this be true?” kind of shtick. What’s it going to take for you people? If you want evidence of aliens, how about that great big spaceship hovering over London on Christmas Day? What about the battle of Canary Wharf? A Cyberman in every home.
Gwen: My boyfriend says it’s like a sort of terrorism. Like they put drugs in the water supplies. Psychotropic drugs. Causing mass hallucinations and stuff.
Jack: Yeah well, your boyfriend is stupid.
Gwen: Oh, you’ve met him.

Gwen: And who are you then?
Jack: Captain Jack Harkness.
Gwen: I did some research. And there’s only one Captain Jack Harkness on record. And he disappeared in 1941.
Jack: Well that couldn’t be me. Could it?

Jack: We don’t just catch aliens. We scavenge the stuff they leave behind, find ways of using it. arming the human race for the future. The twenty-first century is when it all changes. And you’ve got to be ready.
Gwen: But who’s in charge of you? Is it the government or what?
Jack: We’re separate from the police, outside the government, beyond the United Nations. Because if one power got ‘hold of this stuff they could use it for their own purposes.
Gwen: But so could you.
Jack: All alien technology stays on the base. No one’s allowed to take anything outside.

Gwen: So go on then. How the hell did you end up in Cardiff?
Jack: This is Torchwood Three. Torchwood One was London—destroyed in the battle. Torchwood Two is an office in Glasgow—a very strange man. Torchwood Three, Cardiff. Torchwood Four has kinda gone missing but we’ll find it one day.
Gwen: So you just fancied Cardiff?
Jack: There’s a rift in space and time running right through the city.

Gwen: …If you let me go, I’ve got a duty. I can tell them what that does. Because that glove could help us.
Jack: If you remember.
Gwen: What do you mean?
Jack: How’s your drink?
Gwen: Have you poisoned me?
Jack: Don’t be so dramatic. It’s an amnesia pill. My own recipe. With a touch of denial and a dash of retcon. Wake up tomorrow morning, you’ll have forgot everything about Torchwood. Worse still, you’ll have forgotten me. Which is kind of tragic.

Gwen: You bastard!
Jack: Language. Nice knowing you, Gwen Cooper.

Jack: You were right. We could do more to help. What do you think, do you want to join up?
Gwen: Yeah. I do. Yes.

Day One

Jack: Alright, usual formation.
Gwen: What’s the usual formation?
Owen: Varies.
Gwen: How can the usual formation vary?

Owen: Make yourself useful, sweetheart. Pass us that big chisel from the toolbox.
Gwen: Not sweetheart. Gwen. One syllable, I’m sure you can manage it.
Owen: Not sweet cheeks? Freckles. New Girl.
Gwen: It’s a shame your tool’s not big enough for the job. Darlin’.

Gwen: God, this has been the worst first day ever.
Jack: We’ve all made mistakes. Get over it.

PC Andy: Gwen?
Gwen: Hi.
PC Andy: Bloody hell. Look at you all posh. Special Ops? We were wondering.
Gwen: I meant to call. It’s been a bit of a whirlwind.

Carys: You broke my ship.
Gwen: C’mon then. Where are you from and why are you trying to invade Earth? Because you can forget about enslaving us.
Carys: Who said anything about “enslavin'”?
Gwen: Well that’s what you lot do, aliens…. Isn’t it?

Owen about Jack: So what’s he told you?
Gwen: What about?
Tosh: Himself.
Gwen: You’ve been here longer than I have.
Tosh: We were banking on you.
Owen: You’re a copper, you’re trained to ask questions.
Gwen: You don’t know anything?
Owen: Not who he is, not where he’s from. Nothing, except him being gay.
Gwen: No, he’s not. Really, do you think?
Tosh: No. Owen does. I don’t.
Ianto: And I don’t care.
Owen: Period military is not the dress code of a straight man.
Gwen: I think it suits him. Sort of classic.
Tosh: Exactly! I’ve watched him in action. He’ll shag anything if it’s gorgeous enough.

Gwen: After all I said, a severed hand is more important to you than Carys’ life.
Jack: You want to prove yourself? Find her. Get your old pals in the police to do something useful for once.
Gwen: Alright, I’ll give them a call. Put out an APB: woman possessed by gas knobbing fellas to death.

Gwen: What’s this for?
Jack: Need a diagram?
Gwen: I’ve never used a gun before.
Jack: You were in the police.
Gwen: I was on the beat.

Ghost Machine

Gwen: I’ve lost him, Tosh. I’ve lost him.
Tosh: I swear, whatever it is, you’re holding it.

Jack: Gwen? Are you all right?
Gwen: I’ve just seen a ghost.

Owen: Intense emotions can be part of a neurological event. Hallucinations. Dementia.
Gwen: I wasn’t hallucinating, Owen. And I’m not bloody senile.

Jack: You pushed this button and that caused this apparition moment?
Gwen: Yeah. Jack starts fiddling with the device. Jack, no!
Jack: As if.

Gwen: I’m sorry, it’s just… I don’t even kill spiders in the bath.
Jack: Nor do I. Not with a gun.

Cyberwoman

Ianto: Her name’s Lisa. She’s my girlfriend.
Gwen: Why didn’t you tell us? We could have helped you.
Ianto: Torchwood exists to destroy alien threats. Why would I tell you about her?

Gwen: What the hell was that?
Owen: What?
Gwen: Snogging me.
Owen: Last kiss for the condemned man. Bit embarrassing, given we haven’t been killed. What? It’s not like I fancy you or anything.
Gwen: I was on top of you. I could feel your hard-on.
Owen: Well you didn’t exactly struggle or anything.

Gwen: You would never have shot him, not really.
Jack: Wouldn’t I?
Gwen: Would you have shot me if I’d gone and stood by him?
Jack: But you didn’t.
Gwen: If I had though.
Jack: But you didn’t.

Gwen: When she got ahold of you, I thought—just for a moment—I thought maybe you could die after all.
Jack: Wanna know a secret? So did I. And just for a second there, I felt so alive.

Small Worlds

Gwen: Well I suppose one person’s good could be somebody else’s evil.
Estelle: That’s what his father used to say.

Jack: Estelle shouldn’t be living in town. She belongs in the countryside.
Gwen: How often do you get to see her?
Jack: We meet up now and again.
Gwen: Whenever she sees her fairies?
Jack: She calls them fairies, I don’t.
Gwen: What do you call them?
Jack: They’ve never really had a proper name.
Gwen: Why not?
Jack: Something from the dawn of time. Who could possibly put a name to that?

Gwen: Are we talking alien?
Jack: Worse.
Gwen: How come?
Jack: Because they’re part of us—part of our world. Yet we know nothing about them. So we pretend to know what they look like. We see them as happy. We pretend they have tiny little wings and are bathed in moonlight.
Gwen: But they’re not?
Jack: No. Think dangerous. Think something you can only half-see. Like a glimpse, like something out of the corner of your eye. With a touch of myth, a touch of the spirit world, a touch of reality, all jumbled together. Old moments and memories that are frozen in amongst it. Like the breeze spinning around a ringed planet, tossing, turning, whirling. Backwards and forwards through time. If that’s them, we have to find them. Before all hell breaks loose.

Tosh: This is the youngest girl and the girl’s cousin.
Ianto: I blame it on magic mushrooms.
Jack: What you do in private is none of our business.
Gwen: These photographs were fake.
Owen: Conan Doyle believed in them.
Gwen: He was gaga at the time.
Owen: And Houdini.
Gwen: Self-publicist.

Countrycide

Owen about to give Gwen a local anesthetic: Alright, do you want a quip about feeling a small prick?
Gwen: No, but thanks for offering.

Jack: You are wounded!
Gwen: You think that’s going to stop me?

Gwen: All these things…. All these things, they’re changing me. Changing how I see the world. And I can’t share them with anyone.
Owen coming up behind her: You can now.

Greeks Bearing Gifts

Gwen: Oh, you’ so light! You’re like a girl!
Owen: I’m not light. I’m wiry. Fat girls go mad for it. But I guess I don’t need to tell you that.

Gwen’s thoughts on Tosh: Oh, sweetheart, the jeans in the boots thing has really kind of had its day.

Gwen’s thoughts: I can smell Owen. I can smell him on me after that shag in his car this morning. That’s twice now. Does that make it an arrangement? No, has to be more than two times surely. ’Long as we keep it to just the two times we’re fine. What’s Tosh looking at?

Gwen: Don’t let this put you off. The last couple of days you’ve had a look about you. Love suited you.

They Keep Killing Suzie

Gwen: Jack, if there is a link why don’t we just ask the victims ourselves?
Jack: Not the right time for a séance, thank you very much.
Gwen: The first time I met Torchwood, you had that glove.
Jack: Uh uh. No way.
Owen: Not after what it did to Suzie.
Gwen: It brings people back to life. Just for two minutes. We could question the murder victims.
Owen: That’s exactly what she said. She was one of us, we trusted her, and now she’s dead because of that thing.
Jack: The glove stays in the safe where it belongs.
Gwen: These murders are happening because of Torchwood, so Torchwood has got to do something.

Gwen: Have I got this right? When I die, you get to keep all my possessions? My whole life’s gonna get stashed in a locker.
Jack: Rules and regulations.
Gwen: What if I leave all my stuff to Rhys?
Jack: We’ll stash him away too.

Suzie: Who’s using the glove?
Gwen: I’m sorry.
Suzie: Wouldn’t you know it, Gwen bloody Cooper.

Suzie: Funny thing is, you always imagine when you’re dead, “Oh they’re gonna miss me at work. Indispensable.” And look what happened. I got replaced. By someone better. You got that glove working better than I did.
Gwen: I just got lucky.
Suzie: No, it’s more than that. The others, they prefer you.
Gwen: Don’t say that.
Suzie: You got my job. Almost like you planned it.
Gwen: Except I didn’t. And I’m sorry but I’ve got my own function at Torchwood. And I’m a lot more than just a replacement.
Suzie: Have you slept with Owen? silence. There you go. Replace me completely.

Suzie about Jack: Do you ever wonder?
Gwen: What?
Suzie: Who is he?
Gwen: All the time.

Gwen: So what’s out there?
Suzie: Nothing. Just nothing.
Gwen: But if there’s nothing, what’s the point of it all?
Suzie: This is. Driving through the dark. All this stupid tiny stuff. We’re just animals howling in the night. ‘Cause it’s better than silence.

Gwen: So when you die, it’s just—
Suzie: Darkness.
Gwen: And you’re all alone, there’s no one else?
Suzie: I didn’t say that.
Gwen: What d’you mean?
Suzie: Why do you think I’m so desperate to come back? There’s something out there… in the dark. And it’s moving.

Gwen: What’s happening to me?
Suzie: Sorry, Gwen. You’re getting shot in the head. Slowly. Believe me, it hurts. checking her own wound. I’m almost better. Completely gone soon.

Random Shoes

Jack: Anything on his phone from today?
Gwen: Just some pictures of random shoes.

Gwen: It is so good to see you! Eugene, you’re on my leg!
Eugene: Goodbye Gwen.
Gwen: Don’t go now, Eugene. Eugene, please don’t go now. Eugene, please! Please!

Out of Time

Gwen: At least it wasn’t a spaceship full of aliens.
Jack: That might have been easier.

Rhys: Your mum rang. Funny thing, she has no idea who Emma is.
Gwen: No?
Rhys: And I’m thinking back to you and me on the couch. Work calls, you go out in the middle of the night, and come back with a surprise relative. So let’s have it, who exactly is Pollyanna? Aw, is it to do with work?
Gwen: It’s so hard to explain.
Rhys: Do you even know her?
Gwen: She was lost. I’m sorry.
Rhys: What worries me is how easy it seems to be for you to lie to me, Gwen.

Gwen: It’s like two worlds. There’s Torchwood, and then there’s real life.
Emma: That’s why you’ve got to let me go.

Combat

Jack: Sorry to do this, kind of an emergency. I’ll have her back for dessert.
Rhys: Hey, hold on Sarge, that’s my girlfriend.
Gwen: Rhys, this is Jack.
Rhys: Sit down Gwen.

Gwen: He’s my boss.
Rhys: Sit the fuck down.
Gwen: Don’t ever speak to me like that.

Gwen: Owen’s still not answering his phone.
Tosh: Well, he’s been even more erratic than usual since that thing with Diane.
Gwen: Since the what?
Tosh: It’s none of my business.
Gwen: What thing? What thing, Tosh?
Tosh: Owen and Diane. Before she took the plane. They had a thing. You knew that, right?
Gwen: Oh yeah. I just didn’t know they had a thing thing.

Gwen: Tosh mentioned you and Diane. Did you—
Owen: I didn’t want her to go. She went.
Gwen: Why are we still doing this, me and you?
Owen: Fine. Let’s not. I was getting bored of your fuck-tricks anyway.
Gwen: You can be such a wanker sometimes, Owen! Do you know that?
Owen: I do, as a matter of fact.

Gwen: What time will you be back?
Rhys: Not sure.
Gwen: But, I’m in tonight.
Rhys: Well I’m not.

Gwen: I need to tell you something.
Rhys: What sort of thing?
Gwen: I’ve been sleeping, I’ve been having sex with someone else from work. His name’s Owen. I mean, he’s a bit of a tosser actually, and it’s all gonna stop but, um—
Rhys: Shut up—
Gwen: I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.
Rhys: You wouldn’t do that!
Gwen: But I have.
Rhys: Then, then why are you telling me?
Gwen: Because I’m ashamed. And I’m angry. And I want, I want… I need— I need you to forgive me. And because I’ve drugged you.
Rhys: You’ve done what?
Gwen: Just sit down, it’s nothing. It’s just an amnesia pill. Dash of sedative, you’ll wake up tomorrow and you’ll forget everything. Rhys—
Rhys: God. You selfish bitch!
Gwen: I know, I just thought it would give us a chance— a chance to get everything out in the open, you know? Get everything out. Rhys. Stay with me, Rhys! Say you forgive me. Say, “It’s all right, Gwen.” “Gwen, it’s all right.” Say it, please, Rhys. Rhys, just say it once, say it once: “I forgive you.” Rhys, please say it!

Captain Jack Harkness

Gwen: Tosh has written a message at the end. It says, “Tell my family I love them.”

End of Days

Rhys about the global incidents: Do you think it is terrorists?
Gwen: Terrorists bomb things. This is different.
Woman on TV: People didn’t believe us. Now they should. This is the end of days.

Gwen about Owen: Did you have to pick on him in public like that?
Jack: All of our actions have consequences.
Gwen: And all your staff have feelings, Jack. Even Owen.
Jack: Well you would know.

Andy: Everyone’s saying it, you know. In work, on the streets. Do you think this is the end of the world?
Gwen smiling reassuringly: Oh, Andy, don’t be silly. Do you think the world’s gonna end on your shift?
Andy: I’ve seen you use that smile on a lot of people.
Gwen: What smile?
Andy: The smile you use to reassure people when deep down you know everything’s gone to shit.

Gwen: If Owen managed to open the Rift to get you and Tosh back, can’t we do the same for these people? We’ve still got the Rift manipulator.
Jack: There’s a world of difference. We’re talking about taking control of time, not bringing two people back from the past. Besides, look at the damage Owen caused. We mess with it further, we’ll put the whole planet in danger.

Gwen: You bring him back.
Jack: No.
Gwen: The Resurrection Gauntlet.
Ianto: Was destroyed.
Gwen: Perhaps something else.
Jack: I said no.
Gwen: There’s something wrong with time so we can go back to the moment, to the very moment—
Jack: Gwen.
Gwen: Well, there’s gotta be something you can do, otherwise what’s the fucking point of you!?

Jack: You’re a united front now. Toshiko: the poor girl who’ll screw any passing alien that gives her a pendant. Owen: so strong he gets in a cage with a Weevil, desperate to be mauled. Ianto: hiding a cyber-girlfriend in the basement. Your three comrades here pumped bullets into her, remember?
Gwen: I’ve got to get Rhys back.
Jack: Yeah, because you’re so in love with Rhys that you spend half your time in Owen’s bed.
Gwen hitting him: Fuck you!
Owen: We’re relieving you of your command, Captain. We’re opening that Rift and getting back what we lost! Jack gets up. Stay down!
Jack: You gonna be in charge Owen? You’ve gotta have significantly bigger balls. Owen shoots him in the forehead.

Gwen: It’s all right, Jack. Everything is going to go back to normal.

Owen about Jack: He’s ice cold. No vital signs.
Gwen: He survived when you shot him. When I first joined he said he couldn’t die.
Owen: He was wrong.
Gwen: I want to sit with him.
Owen: Gwen, I—
Gwen: I want to sit with him.

Gwen: What happened to the Rift?
Jack: It closed up when Abaddon was destroyed. But it’s gonna be more volatile than ever.
Gwen: The visions we had. We all saw people we loved. What did you see?
Jack: Nothing. There was nothing.
Gwen: Jack. What would have tempted you? What visions would have convinced you to open the rift?
Jack: The right kind of Doctor.

Gwen: Something’s taken him. Jack’s gone.