Mitchell: Come on, let’s get out of here.
Herrick (Jason Watkins): Well I can’t leave the place looking like this.
Mitchell: Don’t other people take care of this kind of thing?
Herrick: Back in Bristol, sure.
Mitchell: What, there’s no vampires in London?
Herrick: Yeah, but their head guy and I, we don’t, um… I sort of killed his mum. Anyway, there’s bound to be a bucket and some Fairy liquid under the sink.
Herrick: Yeah, I’ve got to find the car. I have a vague recollection of parking it on a bridge.
Mitchell: Is there another way out of here?
Girl (Charlene McKenna): You mean like a secret tunnel that connects to the sewage system?
Mitchell: Are you gonna cause me a problem?
Girl: That depends. Are you gonna hurt me?
Mitchell: Right now I’d say it’s about fifty-fifty.
Policeman: You! Get up!
Mitchell: It’s the library books, isn’t it?
Wilson (Ian Puleston-Davies): Well it’s time for affirmative action.
I want this animal sent kicking and screaming to hell, and you’re the man to do it. So. Get in there, vamp up, vamp out, whatever it is you do, and rip this fucker to shreds.
Molly (Molly Jones): Do you like cats?
George: Yeah. I couldn’t eat a whole one though. Who am I kidding? Of course I could.
Ghost Mom: This is nice. It doesn’t smell as bad as I thought it was going to.
Annie: Oh. You’re a, you’re a ghost. And, um, and this is a very small ghost.
Ghost Mom: Sykes told me about you.
Annie: Did he?
Ghost Mom: Yeah. He was telling everyone about you. You’re a celebrity.
Annie: No, not really, I’m not.
Ghost Mom: You resisted death like three times.
Annie: Four. Technically.
Ghost Mom: Oh my god, I’ve been so dying to meet you.
Annie: Oh stop, I’m blushing.
Ghost Mom: Oh, okay.
Girl: So how many people have you killed?
Mitchell: Dunno. It’s hard to say. More than a hundred, less than a thousand.
Lucy (Lyndsey Marshal): I signed on to this to study the genetics of evil. Since when did assassinating vampires become part of the brief?
Kemp (Donald Sumpter): The brief is to combat evil in whatever shape we find it.
Lucy: If he’s clean, as he says he is, then what’s the urgency to deal with it?
Kemp: We have a duty to future generations. As well as to those already lost.
Girl: No remorse? Or does this make it easier to do it? This—what is it—this role you play?
Mitchell: Why couldn’t I have taken a mute hostage?
Girl: That was my last question.
Mitchell: Yeah. It makes it easier, okay?
Girl: So it’s an act.
Mitchell: You said no more questions.
Girl: That wasn’t a question.
Mitchell: Why are you being like this?
Girl: Oh, so you can ask questions?
Mitchell: You’re a funny little thing, you know that?
Girl: I’m not scared of you. Maybe that’s why I’m being like this. At least not as scared as I probably should be.
Mitchell: Yeah. You should be terrified.
Girl: I should be married to David Bowie.
Girl: I still don’t understand why you do it.
Mitchell: It’s complicated.
Girl: Take your time. I’m tied to a bookshelf.
Mitchell: Seriously, do you never stop?
Girl: You know what else I think? No one’s even asked you this before.
Mitchell: I had to kill them, okay? I didn’t have a choice!
Girl: That’s the first thing you’ve said I actually believe. You have to kill them. You don’t really want to.
Sam (Lucy Gaskell): So now you know it all. Single mother, penniless, lives with her mum, can’t hold down a relationship. I’m just going to turn my back now for three seconds just to give you the opportunity to run for the hills.
Mitchell: George, you may want a normal family life, but whether you like it or not, you’re never gonna be a normal family man. You need someone who gets you. The real you.
George: Oh, and Lucy gets you, does she? She accepts you for what you are?
Mitchell: Maybe some day I’ll tell her the truth.
George: Then you’re an idiot. Relationships have secrets. No one can know every square inch of somebody else’s soul, but it doesn’t mean they’re doomed to fail.
Mitchell: No, you’re wrong. I had someone like that. Someone who knew everything about me.
George: Yes, but that was forty years ago.
Girl: Can you do it?
Mitchell: Do what?
Girl: Kill me. That’s how this ends. Can you do it? Not him, he’s…. I’d prefer you to do it if you can.
Mitchell: You have to feed the monster. It’s like keeping a ball in the air, if it drops…. You have to feed it because otherwise this panic creeps in. And it’s not withdrawal. It’s terror. You start seeing the faces again—you think you’ve forgotten them, but they come back. The smell of their hair, their taste on the lips. The last thing they said. The only way to stop it is to kill again. You see it’s not an addiction, it’s cowardice. It’s not being able to face the alternative.
Girl: Have you ever tried to stop? Would you like to try again?
George: You need to move, I need to move. Give me one valid reason why we shouldn’t do it.
George: Two. Give me two valid reasons.
Sam: We hardly know each other.
George: No? Okay. My mother’s maiden name is Harriet. My internet password is password1. I’m indifferent about all competitive sports. And I prefer lager to beer. I don’t understand fishing—What is fishing?—I’m scared of cancer. I voice a bit of a critical objection to drive thru takeaways. And I lost my virginity on a canal boat in Tring.
Sam: Favorite color?
George: That would be gamboge. It’s kind of orangey-brown.
Herrick: Do you remember when we met? At that forest in France? Do you remember our deal?
Mitchell: Yeah. You said if I let you take me, then you’d save my men.
Herrick: Why did I do that? You ever wondered?
Mitchell: No. No.
Herrick: Because I could see in you a great man, a terrible man. An orphan-maker. A breaker of hearts. Now, these people, these children of Darwin, they’ll tell you that you’re wrong. That you’re a monster. Because they’re jealous. Because they’re in chains. That little… scratch of conscience. That’s a lie. That’s not who you are. Now go and kill that girl.
Mitchell: I think it’s under control, but it’s just sleeping. This rage, this hunger, it’s in my bones and I want to stop. I’ve gone clean before. If the conditions are right and I’m in the right place. I can do it, I know I can!
Lucy: What conditions?
Mitchell: Someone to help me! Someone to change my life for. That’s what I’ve been missing all this time, is just someone to— someone like you. I can do this. One more chance is all I need. I want this so much but I can’t do it alone. Please. Please, I’m begging you. Save me.