Carter: What did you say to them? Mitchell: Look, obviously it didn't go so well. Teal'c: I did advise that you were a most unlikely drug smuggler, Colonel Mitchell. Mitchell: Can we please just fall back to the Gate? Eight Hours Earlier Jackson: What the hell was that? Mitchell: What was what? Carter: We're supposed…

Dr. Kelly: I imagine you had to pull some pretty big strings to make this happen. Mitchell: Ferguson got that chunk of metal in his head saving my sorry ass four years ago. Ferguson (Reed Diamond): Doing pretty good. For a guy with a ticking time bomb in his head. Mitchell: Why don't we see…

Landry: Since the second team came back from the right planet at the scheduled time, it's safe to assume that they're the real SG-1. Dr. Lam: Okay. Then who's the other team and where did they come from? Landry: Exactly. Carter: The multiverse theory of quantum physics posits the existence of parallel universes. An infinite…

Landry: We need to set up a meeting. Carter: No need, sir. We've already been invited back for a reception in honor of the scientists who developed the implant technology. Mitchell: I'm hoping there'll be dancing. Sir. Carter: How's it going? Mitchell: I don't think diplomacy's my thing. Jackson: Oh. That's what you're doing. Mitchell:…

Jolan: It was foolish of you to come. The others are distrustful of you. Mitchell: Yeah, I kind of got that. Anything else I need to know? Jolan: Haikon will have the answers. Carter: Orlin, by not letting go of the Ancient knowledge you're damaging your brain. Orlin: Yes. My human brain is failing under…

Mitchell: I'm just saying, it's pure ego. Jackson: Pure ego? That level of enlightenment? Arrogance is about pleasure, right? Wallowing in the pride of one's achievement. Mitchell: You don't think getting a whole galaxy to bow down and worship you is something to write home about? Landry: Colonel Carter! I've read your proposal. Carter: And?…

Landry: If there's something wrong with this Gate, I want to know what it is before anyone else walks through it. Carter: Yes sir. Landry: Find the problem. Until we do, all Gate activity is shut down. Carter: Huh. Maybe it wasn't our fault. Jackson: I thought it was always our fault. Carter: Instead of…

Mitchell: I'm getting that “grasping at straws” feeling. Jackson: Yeah, just don't tell Teal'c. Mitchell: I already did. Jackson: Yeah, what'd he say? Mitchell imitating Teal’c: “The warriors of the Sodan exist, Colonel. I am certain of it.” Jackson: He's more bass. Carter: No tattoo. Teal'c: He is a warrior of the Sodan. Jackson: According…

Teal'c: Brothers and sisters, we finally have the opportunity to govern with authority and respect. Years ago that seemed unthinkable. But now we are in a position to help others who are in need of our support and guidance. Gerak: Why should we help them? Mitchell: How about because... it's the right thing to do.…

Kellana Jaffa: The Jaffa have shed too much blood to replace one false god with another. We have made our decision and we will tell him. Vala: You boys aren't gonna let people from two different planets beat you at your own silly game are you? Jackson: This silly game isn't over yet. Mitchell: That's…

Vala trying to reassure Jackson: Look, I didn't hear any screaming or squishing sounds, so... Vala: I don't know, I don't think he's actually that good. Mitchell: Alright, so I flunked fencing. Jackson: What happened? Mitchell: The whole place is collapsing. We must have done something wrong. Jackson: What'd you take? Vala: What? I— Jackson:…

Colonel Cameron Mitchell: Bigger than I thought it'd be. Harriman: Yes sir. Welcome to Stargate Command. General Landry: Your service record's impeccable, Mitchell. What's wrong with you? Mitchell: Sir? General Landry: Nobody's perfect. Everyone has some sort of character flaw. What's yours? Mitchell: General, I'm here to join SG-1. Landry: Colonel, you're here to lead…