Point of No Return

Martin Lloyd: You’re not dealing with an amateur here. I know all about Roswell, and the Kennedy cover-ups, and the—
Hammond fast-forwarding: He goes on like that for a while.
Martin Lloyd: …and the CIA-sanctioned microwave harassment, and—
Hammond fast-forwarding: Quite a while.
Martin Lloyd: …and the lizard people. {Jack smiles}. But the point is, none of these compare to your little secret, Colonel.

Jackson: You know I’ve never been on a stakeout before. Shouldn’t we have like donuts or something?

Martin Lloyd (Willie Garson): …a top-secret government program involving instantaneous travel to other solar systems by means of a device known as a Stargate.
O’Neill: Sounds like a good idea for a TV show. If you’re into that sort of thing.

O’Neill: There is a top secret government program called Project Stargate.
Martin: I knew it!
O’Neill: But it has nothing to do with space travel.
Martin: What does it have to do with?
O’Neill: Magnets.
Martin: What the hell is that supposed to mean?
O’Neill: Nope. I’ve said too much.

Martin: Colonel O’Neill, the truth is I’m not just interested in outer space. I’m from outer space.
O’Neill: Check please!

Teal’c picking up a toy laser gun: It would appear this weapon is ineffective.

Martin: Don’t you want to know how I found you?
O’Neill: Ah… I’m okay.
Martin: I noticed in your car there was a map for the Sleep-Rite Motel. I checked every one in town.
O’Neill: There’s two.

O’Neill: What do you want?
Martin: I want to go home. You have to take me through the Stargate.

Alien: So you’re telling me this man is an ordinary technical sergeant.
Jackson: I wouldn’t say ordinary.
Carter: He’s very good at what he does.
Alien: What’s his area of expertise?
Carter: Speech writer.
Alien showing them Teal’c’s scan: What about this?
Jackson: Oo. That’s very good. Did you draw that yourself?
Carter: What is it?
Jackson: That’s a duck, isn’t it?

Martin talking into his lapel: Nice van! What do you call that color? Kind of a grayish-green, huh?