Moebius: Part 1

Carter: What is it?
Jackson: Catherine Langford died last night.

O’Neill surveying the delivery: Have you been shopping online lately?

Jackson: Holy buckets. This looks like her entire collection.
O’Neill: I prefer stamps.

Jackson: Jack, we need to talk! Oh! Sorry for interrupting.
O’Neill: No! It’s okay. It’s important. You must interrupt. You must.
Jackson: I think we may have found a ZPM.
O’Neill: Yes!

Teal’c: It is possible Ra simply took the device with him when he left Earth.
Carter: In which case it could be anywhere by now.
Jackson: We don’t know where it is now, but we do know where it was. Giza, 3000 BC.
Carter: You can’t be serious.

Jackson: We have a time machine. We can go back and get the ZPM
O’Neill: She wouldn’t let me go back and watch the Cubs win the World Series.

Dr. Carter: Just because my reproductive organs are on the outside instead of the inside, doesn’t— God, that’s horrible! Who would ever say that?

Dr. Jackson: What’s this?
Hammond: Non-disclosure agreement. What we’re about to discuss has been classified top secret by the United States government.
Dr. Jackson: What if we don’t want to sign it?
Hammond: Well then you’re free to leave.
Carter hurriedly signs it.

Hammond: We didn’t bring you here because of the camera. We brought you here because of what was recorded on the tape inside that camera.

Dr. Carter: Are you telling us that, in some alternate timeline we’re part of a team that travels to other planets and defends Earth against alien invasions?

Dr. Carter: What do you think they’re gonna do? Ask us to join an elite team of intergalactic space heroes? Look at us. I think the only reason that they showed us the tape is because we’re on it.
Dr. Jackson: Exactly.
Dr. Carter: Oh.

Hammond: I want you both to know that your help on this project was most appreciated. Your country owes you a debt of gratitude.
Dr. Jackson: But we’re not done yet.
Hammond: Actually, we’re not done. You two, however, have a plane waiting to take you home.

Hammond: I’m sorry, Dr. Jackson. But neither you nor Dr. Carter possess the training or qualifications for a mission like this. That’s just the way it is.