User Review( votes)
Judge Grace Lema: Mr. Beecher, I appreciate your taking the time to see me.
Beecher: Well, you know, it’s a nice break from getting fucked up the ass.
Beecher: Whatcha reading? Mein Kampf? I’ll tell you how it ends. The Aryans get their ass kicked.
Beecher: Don’t be mad.
Keller: I’m not mad.
Beecher: Yeah, you are.
Keller: No, it was a stupid idea. I just didn’t think things through. That’s my problem. I don’t think anything all of the fucking way through.
Beecher: I hate it when you’re self-deprecating. It’s so cute.
Nathan: You need to cut those fingernails.
Beecher: I will. As soon as I get back to my pod.
Beecher: Never considered that, huh? That it could’ve been me, standing in the dark in that storage room, watching you stack copying paper. And then: boom. Boom, baby!
Keller: Toby, was it you?
Beecher: No. But for a second, you believed it could have been. It could have been good ol’ Toby.
Keller: You didn’t kill Metzger.
Beecher: Nah. How could a little pussy bitch like me hurt anyone?
Keller: Beecher, if you weren’t in the storage room, how did you know I was shelving copy paper?
Beecher: Hmm… I dunno. Shit, maybe it was me.
Beecher: Tsk, tsk, tsk… Vern, you need to adjust your attitude. If not, I got no reason to keep being the good friend to you that I am.
Schillinger: Good friend?
Beecher: Yeah. If not for what I have done, then for what I haven’t.
Schillinger: What’s that?
Beecher: I haven’t fucked him. At least not yet. You see, because I was there for Andrew when he needed someone, holding him—comforting him—I think he’s developed a little bit of a crush on me. I have been tempted to at least deep tongue him a couple times, but I knew that would upset you so I haven’t. Even though he wants me to stick my dick up his ass. And I’m afraid one of these nights, he and I alone in our pod, I’m not gonna be able to control myself.
Schillinger: You’ll be dead before you get the chance.
Beecher: Well, you better hurry. Keller’s getting horny and O’Reily’s been talking about a three-way with Cyril and Andy.
Beecher: Keller. I just asked McManus to let you be my roommate again.
Said: Don’t hate yourself.
Beecher: Why not? My son is dead because of me. My daughter’s a mess because of me. And Keller… Keller doesn’t love me. But I tried this new detergent, it really seems to get the whites clean.
Logan: All these incidents involved two other prisoners, Christopher Keller and Vernon Schillinger. Tell me about your relationship with them.
Beecher: We sing in the choir together.
Edward Gallson: As long as we understand each other. Fucking faggots are ruining the military. “Don’t ask, don’t tell,” my ass.
Beecher: I agree. You know, I think the military should stay the way it’s always been—a bunch of redneck he-men who murder children and rape women.
Gallson: You making a joke of me?
Beecher: Seems like you’re doing a pretty good job all on your own.
Beecher: Imagine that. Said, Schillinger, and me in a three-way.
Said: May I remind you of your promise to yourself never to speak to Keller again?
Beecher: Yeah. Well the great thing about breaking a promise to yourself is that only one person gets hurt. And I can live with my guilt a shitload easier than I can live without ever seeing Keller again.
Keller: I couldn’t face living the rest of my life in here without you. Don’t you see? I did what I did out of love.
Beecher: I loved alcohol. I loved heroin. But I had to put them behind me because they were poison. Death. You… are death.