Season 1

Scary Sherry: Bianca’s Toast

Halloween Night, 1987 Young Gus: Well can I eat my candy? Henry: Yeah. Knock yourself out, Lando. As long as your old man doesn't mind his nine-year-old son passing razor blades. Young Shawn with his eyes covered: Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Young Gus: Not even sort of. Exactly Twenty Years Later... Give or…

Game, Set… Muuurder?

1985 Henry: You both know that I have a partner on the force, right? Young Gus and Shawn: Yes sir. Henry: Well we couldn't do our job if we didn't trust each other completely. There are rules to our partnership and they are the same rules to our friendship. Even Battleship. But those rules don't…

Cloudy, Chance of Murder

1985 Young Shawn: Dad, why do those people get better seats than us? Henry: Shawn, those people aren't just watching the trial. Those people are the trial. They're the jurors. And they are the most important people in this room. Present Day Shawn: Gus, they impounded my motorcycle without warning. Gus: I'm pretty sure the…

From the Earth to Starbucks

1987 Young Shawn: I need eighty cents. Henry: No you don't. You need to put back two of those extra candybars that you just picked up. Young Shawn: Dad, you don't understand! I can't put back one of these. That'd be like saying one of these candybars is less worthy than the others. And I…

Forget Me Not

1986 Ms. Bodansky: Our next step is the primate habitat. Young Shawn: Hear that, Trish. Monkeys. We're going to visit your family. Young Trish: Knock it off, Shawn. Present Day Shawn: Woah woah woah. Okay okay. If we're gonna do the lip reading game we have to say things that are remotely believable. Gus: I…

Shawn vs. the Red Phantom

1986 Henry: Where'd these comics come from? Gus, right? Come here. Well at least you're not a tattle tale. Young Shawn: What's the big deal? All the kids read them. Henry: Well, all the kids don't live in this house and all the kids don't have a police officer as a father, Shawn. Young Shawn:…

Who Ya Gonna Call?

1986 Henry: You can't run away from the bad guys forever, Shawn. Eventually you gotta come up with a new approach Young Shawn: So? Henry: So. Find one. Henry: Not bad. You faced your fears, you got a new result, and you came out ahead. Did you really memorize those test answers. Young Shawn: Yeah.…

Weekend Warriors

1986 Henry: For every action there is an opposite and equal reaction." Who? Young Gus: Isaac Newton. Third law of motion. Henry: And how does that apply to the nature of man? Anyone. Shawn? Young Shawn: You push, they push back. Henry: Correct. Why? Shawn: Because "man is a stupid creature who would rather fight…

9 Lives

1985 Henry: Where's the ring? Young Shawn: At the bottom. Now I gotta eat the whole box. Henry: And where's the ring now? Young Shawn: At the top. Henry: Right. See sometimes Shawn, you don't have to dig so deep. All you gotta do is turn something upside down to make it right-side up and…

Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Piece

1985 Young Shawn (Liam James): But we're just playing. Henry: Well play right, Shawn. Or don't play at all. Present Day Gus: What are you doing? Shawn: Dude, I'm on to something big. Gus: Tailing cops. In a police station? Shawn: Some monumentally expensive ring just got stolen. I'm gonna get us onto the case.…

Spellingg Bee

Shawn: Excuse me. You're in my seat. Juliet "Jules" O'Hara (Maggie Lawson): Am I? Shawn: Actually yes, you are. Juliet: Are you one of those weirdo compulsives who come to the same restaurant, sit in the same chair and eat the same food every day? Shawn: Ah, no no. I was sitting right there three…

Pilot

1986 Santa Barbara, CA Henry Spencer (Corbin Bernsen): How many hats? Young Shawn (Josh Hayden): Come on, Dad! Henry: Shawn, you want a piece of cake. How many hats are in the room? Young Shawn: Does a beanie count? Henry: What do you think? Young Shawn: Three. Henry: Describe them. Young Shawn: That's not fair!…