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I’m sitting in my living room watching an insurance adjuster look over my car. I was out of town over the weekend and caught in a hail storm. I figured it was a bit of a wash, given my deductible. I thought I’d at least see what the difference was.

But now I’m feeling a bit salty about the whole thing. He did an initial scan while I was out there and said that it might make sense just to total out the car, given the amount of hail damage.

How dare he just write off my car. My car’s awesome. He wishes he could be my car. And as he scours my car, ticking off all the things wrong with it, there’s an anvil dropping in the Warehouse District.

If an anvil drops in the Warehouse District and I’m not there to watch it…