Homerland 25 years and they can't come up with a new punishment? Carl: Man I love conventions. Lenny: Yeah, they're the perfect combination of work and binge drinking. Marge: Dear Christian God— Lisa: Hey! Marge: Sorry. Lisa: Bart, why is the dad I always wished for creeping me out? Bart: I don't know. Because you're…

Elementary School Musical When I slept in class it was not to help Leo DiCaprio Homer: It's 4am. You kids should have been in bed a half hour ago. Kent Brockman: And now to comment on joining the ranks of Martin Luther King, Gandhi and Desmond Tutu, here's the man who always parks in my…

Treehouse of Horror Marge: Hello, everyone. You know, Halloween is a very strange holiday. Personally, I don't understand it. Kids worshipping ghosts, pretending to be devils. Things on TV that are completely inappropriate for young viewers. Things like the following half-hour! Nothing seems to bother my kids, but tonight's show—which I totally wash my hands…

Season 1 Homer: Is that a good siren? Am I approved? Cowboy Bob (A. Brooks): You ever known a siren to be good? No, Mr. Simpson, it's not. It's a bad siren. That's the computer in case I went blind telling me, "Sell the vehicle to this fellah and you're out of business." Cowboy Bob:…