In the Forest of the Night

Maebh (Abigail Eames) knocking on the TARDIS: I’m lost. Please, can you help me?
The Doctor pointing: It’s that way. {looking out} Are those trees?
Maebh: I need the Doctor. Are you the Doctor?
The Doctor: Yes. Do you have an appointment? You need an appointment to see the Doctor.
Maebh: Please, something’s chasing me.

The Doctor demonstrating: When you drink a glass of Coke, it’s only this big. But it’s got this much sugar in it. Works a bit like that.
Maebh: What does?
The Doctor: The TARDIS. It’s bigger on the inside than the outside. Or did you not notice?
Maebh: I just thought it was supposed to be bigger on the inside, so I didn’t say anything.
The Doctor: Well of course it’s supposed to be bigger. Most people are confused by that.
Maebh: I find everything confusing really. So I don’t say anything. That’s how come I’m in the woods. I thought Miss Oswald told me to find the Doctor, but it wasn’t her. It was just in my head.
The Doctor: Miss Oswald? Dark hair? Highly unpredictable? Surprisingly round face?
Maebh: Everyone says she’s in love with Mr. Pink.
The Doctor: The PE teacher.
Maebh: Maths. I really like him. I was in his group.
The Doctor: Mr. Pink was looking after you? Well that explains why you’re lost.

The Doctor: It doesn’t surprise you that I know all about your school?
Maebh: Everyone seems to know everything about everything, apart from me.
The Doctor: That’s not quite true. I, for instance, have no idea why, when the terrestrial navigation— {he slaps at her hand} when the terrestrial navigation starts up, it closes down all the other systems.
Maebh: You should ask somebody who knows.
The Doctor: Hm. That’s another of the drawbacks of being the last of your species. No one to ask when your TARDIS won’t start.

TARDIS: You have reached your destination.
The Doctor: No we haven’t we’re supposed to be in the middle of London.
TARDIS: You have reached your destination.
The Doctor: Oh, stop saying that!
Maebh: She’s only saying it because it’s true. We are in the middle of London.
The Doctor: We are in the middle of a forest.
Maebh: Come and see.

Samson (Jaydon Harris-Wallace): Wow. Sir, where are we?
Danny (Samuel Anderson): What do you mean, where are we?
Ruby (Harley Bird): We can’t have been asleep for that long, can we?

Jenny Hill: You’ve heard of leaves on the line. This is going to be slightly harder to clear.

Accra Reporter (Nana Amoo-Gottfried): In three hours time, the Ghana Black Stars are due to play Sierra Leone in the African Cup of Nations…. It does not look like the pitch will be ready.

Clara: You’re always showing me amazing things. Well I, Doctor, have finally got something amazing to show you.
The Doctor: Yes, well there are some things that I’ve never seen. That’s usually because I’ve chosen not to see them. Even my incredibly long life is too short for Les Miserables.
Clara: Oh Doctor, you are going to love this.
The Doctor: Well, when you come to collect this child you can tell me then.
Clara: Huh? What child?
The Doctor: Young female human. Standard defenseless little girl. Your friend Mr. Pink was supposed to be looking after her.
Clara: She probably has a name.
The Doctor: Good point. {to Maebh} You. Have you got a name at all?
Maebh: Maebh. My name’s Maebh.

Clara: Is she all right? Will you bring her over?
The Doctor: I can’t bring her over. I’m a Time Lord not a child minder.
Clara: You’ve got a spaceship. All we’ve got are Oyster cards.
The Doctor: And I’ve got a global rapid reforestation crisis to deal with.

Danny: You didn’t call the school, you called him.
Clara: No. He called me actually. I can’t stop him calling me, can I?
Danny: I thought you weren’t in contact.
Clara: London has just been taken over by a gigantic forest. Who do you want to talk to, Monty Don?
Danny: I want to do my job, which is looking after these kids.
Clara: Oh really? How many kids?

Bradley (Ashley Foster): I thought you said they’re in love. Why are they shouting at each other?
Ruby: That’s what people do when they’re in love. Don’t you know anything?

Ruby: This tree has got blossoms and nuts.
Clara: Oh yeah. Yeah, that is strange.

Neighbor (Michelle Asante): I think we should have been consulted. What’s it made of even?
Maebh’s Mum (Siwan Morris): How far does this go? I need to collect Maebh.

Ruby to Danny: Look sir. No rings. trees usually have rings to tell you how old they are. This one’s got no rings. Why is that then, sir?
The Doctor: The rings mark the years of growth. One ring for each year. This grew up overnight. That whole tree is the result of just one night’s growth. And they’re still growing.
Clara: Everyone, this is the Doctor and he’s going to sort everything out. Isn’t that right, Doctor? That’s what he does.
The Doctor: Well having looked at things I think probably the answer to that is no.
Clara: He always says that. He’s really clever.
The Doctor: Oh yes, I am very clever. But what use is clever against trees? They don’t list to reason, you can’t plead with them, you can’t lie to them. They’ve got no moving parts, no circuits. This is a natural event!
Danny: How can it be natural for a tree to grow in one night?
The Doctor: Exactly what they said about the Ice Age.

The Doctor: Gifted and Talented. Really?
Clara: Furious, fearful, tongue-tied. They’re all super powers if you use them properly. Are they going to be all right?
The Doctor: They’re in the TARDIS, the safest place on the planet.

The Doctor: If this is an invasion…
Clara: What?
The Doctor: It’s over. They’re here and they’ve won. What do they want?

Clara: Any minute now we’re going to find a gingerbread cottage with a cannibal witch inside.

The Doctor: What sort of forest is clever? What sort of forest has its own in-built fire extinguisher?
Clara: What do they want?
The Doctor: Why now?
Clara: What do you mean, “Why now”?
The Doctor: The whole natural order is turning against this plant. But why? Why now?

The Doctor with Maebh’s homework: How did she know this?
Clara: What is it?
This is a massive solar flare headed for Earth like the one that destroyed the Bank of Karabraxos. I’ve got an entire TARDIS and I didn’t notice this. But she knew. How?
Clara: This is Maebh’s. Where did you get this?
The Doctor: You left your marking on the TARDIS.
Clara: Oh great. Right. Well that’s just brilliant, isn’t it. You don’t think Danny saw this, do you?
The Doctor: I’ve just informed you that a solar flare’s going to wipe out your planet. You’re worried about a row with your boyfriend?

The Doctor: How did she know this? She even put the date on it.
Clara: I always make them date their homework.
The Doctor: It’s today’s date!

Clara: Was that a wolf? No. That is impossible We’re in London.
The Doctor: Would that be the London with a zoo. The zoo with a pack of wolves. The zoo whose barriers and gates have probably been mangled by the trees? No. Wolves are not impossible. Stick to the path, Red Riding Hood.
Clara: There is no path.
The Doctor: Then we’re lunch.

The Doctor: There are very good, solid scientific reasons for being really quite frightened just now.

Maebh: It’s coming. It’s coming for everyone and I can’t unthink it.
The Doctor: Maebh. Maebh, this forest is communicating. With you. Nobody else. No technology can hear what it’s saying. But you can.

We are here. Here always since the beginning and until the end.
The Doctor: Here? That’s it.
We are the green shoots that grow between the cracks, the grass that grows over the mass graves. After your wars are over, we will still be here. We are the life that prevails.

The Doctor: What is it with you people? You hear voices, you want to shut them up. The tress come to save you, you want to chop them down.
Clara: Or you think that you need to save the world when its already saving itself.
The Doctor: I did admit that I was wrong.

Maebh: Be less scared. Be more trusting.

The Doctor: I hope I’m right. It’d be slightly awkward if the world was destroyed at this point.

Missy (Michelle Gomez) watching Earth: Now that was surprising. I love surprises.